(I intended for this to be set as a premiere on YouTube, but it didn’t work. Oops).
I’ve been sitting on this video for a while now, and I finally got around to editing and uoploading it. In this, I unbox a new anthology from Onward and Upward Media, A Time for Everything, which is a collection of short stories to which I contributed. Each of the tales within is based on a line from Ecclesistes 3. I chose “a time to dance” because I’m a ballroom dancer in my spare time. Enjoy this fun little video!
It’s been a long time since I’ve posted anything of note on this website. I’ll say it’s a New Year’s Resolution to remedy that. So, let’s start that off with a mandatory post about my newly published book, Zorsam and the God Who Devours!
Some years ago in a wonderful place called Story, Indiana, a bunch of my college writer friends and I made a pilgrimage to have a weekend retreat in a big cabin. Amidst some sightseeing and tabletop gaming, we all sat down and discussed doing a big year-long project together we called “The Pulp Fiction Project” (the “literary genre,” not the Tarantino movie). We listed several types of stories that you’d see in old pulp magazines, including space western, monster story (which led to Destroyer), and “barbarian story.” My friend Nick Hayden chose to write that last one. Over the course of the next year, our goal was to have multiple 30,000-word novellas in the style of old dime store novels. Each would have three writers who took four months each to write about 10,000 words a piece before passing it on to another writer whose name would be drawn from a hat. It fell to Aaron Brosman second and finally to me.
It sat on the proverbial shelf (or rather, hard drive) for years until Nick attempted to get it published with a publishing house he was with a few years ago. That didn’t work out, so I contacted Wild Hunt Press, who jumped at the chance to publish some sword and sorcery.
What’s this book about? In a nutshell: a barbarian cooler than Conan.
You read that right.
Here’s the back cover copy:
Zorsam is a mighty and savage warrior born in an undreamed of and unrecorded age, filled with strange kingdoms, fierce warriors, dark magick, nightmarish monstrosities, and terrifying deities. Among the latter is the dreaded Manrix, the God Who Devours, a bestial deity who demands the sacrifice of young female virgins to keep his appetite sated and appeased. His most powerful follower in that bygone era is the brutal King Margruxks, the ruler of the much-respected kingdom of Glaur, whose latest intended sacrifice is a young woman named Asundi.
Zorsam is soon to learn, through a deadly series of trials he is put through by an avatar of Death itself, that the sacrificial girl is one of his tribe, and he becomes determined to do the unthinkable and take on his greatest trial yet: invading the lands of Glaur, oppose King Margruxks and his deadly minions, and dare to deny Manrix his demanded offering by rescuing Asundi.
Among King Margruxk’s soldiers are the brothers Zaduk and Fria, unconquerable warriors who control the forces of fire and ice respectively, which will more than ensure Zorsam a challenge that shall truly earn him the title of one of the greatest warriors of all time — if he survives. For even if he gets through this incredible gauntlet, he must then face the deadly sword of King Margruxks himself, and ultimately, the power of the God Who Devours.
The blood-stained saga of Zorsam begins here, and it is brought to you by no less than three authors who have made the sword and sorcery genre their passion.
It’s available on Amazon as an eBook right now, but the paperback is coming soon!
If schedules allow, I’m hoping to do a livestream with both Nick and Aaron on my YouTube channel to discuss the book and the process of writing it. Stay tuned!
In meantime, start the New Year off with a new book!
I’m on a roll! (That was the correct “roll,” right?)
Actually, I just wanted to get another new book ready for Gen-Con 2015. Plus, this one has been sitting in my computer for a long time and needed to get into print.
So, without further ado, I present Ninjas and Talking Trees, which is book one of The (Mis)Adventures of George Francis.
Cover art by Anthony Gangemi.
George Francis is a normal accountant in Fort Wayne, Indiana, who has it all: a disciplined routine, a great job, and a hot girlfriend named Destiny. Well, there are his uber-nerd college buddies, but they’re mostly harmless…until they met his Destiny. She dumps George immediately. They invite a heartbroken George to join them at a renaissance faire to make it up to him. But after entering a port-a-potty to soothe his aching stomach, George is transported to the world of Loconia and chased by ninjas.
Soon George meets Sensei, a Talking Tree who was once a samurai. He insists George is the “Hero of Legend,” and it’s his new destiny to liberate Loconia from the eccentric tyrant Marcus the Morally-Dubious in order to return home. George must survive Sensei’s grueling training (which includes dueling a samurai banzai tree) and then rescue Princess Pansy/Roze, who’s been cursed with a split personality—one good, one evil—that switches whenever someone snaps his fingers. To complicate matters, the good one is in love with George and the evil one plans to marry Marcus.
But George isn’t alone. He recruits Loconia’s bravest and finest to battle Marcus’ Legions of Terror: an unknowingly hapless pretty boy; an inarticulate Barbarian carrying a well-spoken ax; and a redneck wizard whose spells work better when he’s drunk.
Oh snap!
Will George’s sanity survive? Will he become the Hero of Legend? Will you stop reading this back cover and open the book to find out? (Just don’t skip to the end, you cheater!)
This book has an origin that’s just as humorous. During my last semester at Taylor University Fort Wayne, I took a class on C.S. Lewis and George McDonald that was taught by Dr. Pam Jordan-Long. One of the books we read was Phantastes by McDonald. A classmate told me before class that he thought it was a bit slow in middle and joked that it would’ve been better if ninjas were in it. But he didn’t stop there—he said that in class, too! Since Phantastes featured talking trees, we concluded as a class that all good stories must include ninjas and talking trees. It quickly became a prominent inside joke in the class for the rest of the semester. Even the normally serious Dr. Jordan-Long enjoyed it so much she put it on the final exam.
I decided then that since I couldn’t find any stories that featured both, I would write one myself. Since I’d just written Pandora’s Box, I decided I would do something completely different to avoid being pigeonholed as a writer, so I decided to write a fantasy/comedy. As the years went on, I collected many ideas for the book. Too many, in fact, for one book, which is why I’ve decided to make I a series. Essentially, it’s become a repository for my eccentric, absurdist sense of humor. You’ll see shades of Monty Python, Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, and The Princess Bride, among other things, in it.
There’s more I could say about the book, but I’ll save that for another blog. This one’s long enough as it is.
Get your paperback copy of Ninjas and Talking Trees today on Amazon for $14.99! (EBook coming soon!)
As promised, I’ve started my series on writing speculative fiction. In this episode, I give tips on world building. Be sure to take notes. Leave comments so we can discuss the topic.
I have great news. As of last night, I completed the second draft of my fantasy/comedy novel, Ninjas and Talking Trees, and submitted it to Hades Publications, who published my first novel, Pandora’s Box, under their Absolute XPress imprint in 2010. Now I must wait and see if they are interested in publishing it.
This book tells the tale of a young accountant who is transported to an eccentric fantasy world ruled by an equally eccentric tyrant. In order to get home, he must learn “the Ways of Hero-dom” and overthrow the villain. While it isn’t a parody, per se, it does poke fun at some fantasy story stereotypes (and a few from anime/manga), and it uses many of the genre’s archetypes for comedic effect.
You can read more about the humorous history of the story here. I also have a short story entitled “Bow to Your Sensei” that I wrote as a warm-up to the book several years ago for a blog contest. It’s posted here.
Stay tuned for more updates!
A Man from Another Time Exploring Another Universe
